I'm Back

I'm back in Oregon! I have been welcomed with very much Oregon too might I add :)

I was welcomed in P-town by my lovely sister who was carrying flowers and a welcome home sign. I enjoyed talking to her as we stopped at Panda and then the 2hr car ride which she so kindly let me drive home to our wonderful parents. It was fun to sit and talk with my family. Then, my sister left the living room and came back with something wrapped in green tissue paper. I opened it to find some photos from IBEX. I just started crying like a baby. Wow, I wish I could describe to you my experience but I honestly don't know how but I know that Israel and people in my group have become a part of me and I can feel something missing in my heart. It has been so hard to try and transition back. But people have been helpful to give me my space and find things for me to do.

My time has consisted of running down Fern Ridge Road which has been so good! It has given me some time to think as well as time to divert my thoughts to physical pain. Oregon green is all around me and music is streaming through my ears as I talk to my Heavenly Father who does have a plan, better than any I could come up with for myself.

got Danae to go with me on one of the runs

Then I have been able to just walk around the yard. Dad even found a baby bird!

My skype dates and phone calls have been a huge part in keeping me going and it is amazing how much seeing IBEX faces can do for a person :) They just light up my life.

And then there have been multiple text messages and a few messages. I miss those people a whole lot.

I also got to do a photoshoot which was so fun to get back into it.

I never expected the transition to be this hard, i mean i knew it would be hard but it is so hard to feel this empty hole/missing piece of my heart. It has been a lot more drawn out and difficult then I thought it would be. After talking to some of my IBX family it sounds like many of them are going through the same kinds of things which is very comforting.

Last week I meet a friend and we went to a coffee shop and talked for at least two hours which was so good and then today I meet another friend and we also talked for a couple hours. I just have to keep looking for the sunshine through this temporary cloud called transition because there is good in it and people have been so good to help me through it.

Right now I am searching for direction for my life. I am second guessing my major, don't have enough money to go back to Master's so do I loan it or take a year off, looking for a job and haven't heard back from the places I sent resumes to.  Let's just say the Lord is telling me to trust!

Well, i think i'm gunna sign off. I am sitting in the Lebanon library looking out over the green lawn, past the oak tree to the road watching the cars go by as I wait for four to come around to meet a high school teacher and friend who invested in me.

Thanks for reading! I promise, they will get happy :)